Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
