Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
