There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
