wake up i wanna do it froggy style
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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