You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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