New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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