Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
