I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
