12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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