Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
