I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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