Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
