it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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