We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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