He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
