At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize