So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
