They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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