There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
