Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
