I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
