whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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