May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Boobs are out for the taking
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
