Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
