she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize