I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize
