You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
A bitchslap is in order.
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