You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
