I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
