Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
