Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Randomize
