So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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