she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
