like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
