oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
