dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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