I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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