he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
