No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
