I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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