i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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