you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
