Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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