great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
