she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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