I can tuck mytits in my pants
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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