shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I can't turn off my feet"
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
