we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
