hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
