And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
