Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize